National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 17 (May 13–19)


Well, we’re drinking from the fire hose again this week, and most of the newswater is pretty fetid. There were a few bright spots, thankfully, but consider yourselves forewarned anyway — this was a pretty rough week.

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not a postage rate! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

It was another fairly quiet week regarding Casual Disregard of Governing Norms, but there were a couple of things worth noting:

There were a couple of developments on the Russia Investigation front too. Here’s a summary of the main things to know:

Your “Normal” Weird:

The Bad:

The Good:

And that’s the news this week! It was in fact as awful as forecast last week, but hopefully that means next week will be better. But I’ll be back either way, because I’m good at Weeble impressions, and I hope you are also! In the meantime, feel free to ping the National News Roundup ask box. Send me questions! Send me feedback! Send me a better executive branch!

National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 15 (April 29-May 5)

[Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

The name of the game this week is ‘weird.’ Seriously, folks — the bad news is weird. The good news is weird. Even the Mueller investigation stuff is weird. There’s a bit of straight-up-bad news as well — because we’re still living under the Trump administration — but for the most part it’s incompetence, ignorance, and one-eighties all the way down.

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not a stump speech! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

Though not as much as last week, there were still a couple of Casual Disregard of Governing Norms this week as well. Here are the main things to know:

There was a fair amount happening this week on the Russia Investigation front too, as several different interrelated issues moved forward. Here’s a summary of the main things to know:

Your “Normal” Weird:

The Bad:

The Good:

And that’s the news this week! Enjoy the mostly-benign surreality while it’s possible, because we’ll be back to a Trash Fire special by this time next week. But I’ll be back, and I’m hoping so will you, and if you need anything before then, feel free to ping the National News Roundup ask box. Send me questions! Send me feedback! Send me small flightless water fowl!

National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 14 (April 22–28)


Well, this week is definitely making up for lost time. It’s like all relevant parties tried News Week Lite last week and decided it wasn’t enough calories, so this week has three extra helpings of Modern Flavor Trash Fire. But there’s a lot of good news, too — turns out some of it makes a good Garbage Bin Flambe — so it could be worse.

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not a congressional hearing! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

There was a lot of Casual Disregard of Governing Norms this week, even by our ordinary standards — it’s like the executive branch was saving up for a special occasion. Here are the wacko highlights:

There was a fair amount happening this week on the Russia Investigation front too, as several different interrelated issues moved forward. Here’s a summary of the main things to know:

Your “Normal” Weird:

The Bad:

The Good:

So that’s what I have for now, and I think we can all agree it is more than enough. I’ll be back next week, and if you need anything before then, feel free to ping the National News Roundup ask box — send me questions! Send me feedback! Send me trash fire recipes!

National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 13 (April 15–21)


After a zillion years of Bad News Bears, I’m just not sure what to do with the mostly-weird-and-somewhat-good news cycle I have in front of me this week. It’s like watching it rain fish after weeks and weeks of drought — sure, you were planning to make fish stew tonight, but what just happened? And is that fish even safe to eat?

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not a tax collector! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

This week had only one real instance of Casual Disregard of Governing Norms. That said, that one instance was pretty concerning. Here’s the deal:

It was also a pretty quiet week on the Russia Investigation front, but there were a few things of note. Here’s a summary of the main things to know:

Your “Normal” Weird:

  • Pruitt Petition. As the Office of Management and Budget investigates whether Scott Pruitt broke federal laws by ordering his bonkers sound-proof phone booth, 170 Democrats and 4 Republicans have introduced resolutions in the House and Senate calling for his resignation. The petition is definitely more statement than intended action at this point, since the resolution only has forty Senators on board — not the whole Democratic bloc, and they’d need another Republican to join. But it’s a startling (and apparently historic) number of cosponsors, so the petition does definitely make its point.
  • Your Apparently Weekly Sex Scandal Update. There’s still a lot of white noise on the sex scandal fronts, which I’m guessing is an intentional effort on Stormy Daniels’ part — though honestly, there are worse things in the world than making people continue to care about this lawsuit. Ex-Playboy model Karen McDougal settled her contract case and now can talk about things to her heart’s content. Meanwhile, Stormy Daniels has offered $100,000 to anyone who can use a forensic sketch to identify the man she says threatened her in 2011. Since those aren’t exactly super accurate, she’s probably trying to keep the publicity ball rolling rather than expecting results. But she says she now has 1,500 leads, so it’s successful on at least one front so far.
  • Michael Cohen Updates. Things are a mess for Michael Cohen after his spectacular cascading failures in court last week. There’s lots of speculation that he’ll flip on Trump, his attempt to delay the Stormy Daniels suit failed when the judge refused paperwork filed on his behalf, and everything else going on forced him to drop the defamation suits against BuzzFeed and FusionGPS. Gosh, it’s so sad when legal systems function properly.
  • IRS Ires Us. The IRS made a lot of people cranky this week when the electronic filing system crashed on tax day, scaring the dividends off of a lot of last-minute filers who were told the system would come back online December 31, 9999. (These filers were, thankfully, given extensions.) But the last-minute filer crowd did not include Donald Trump, who simply asked for an extension (because of course he did). I don’t think anyone’s surprised that Trump didn’t file, especially because he did the same thing last year, but it’s still not exactly Presidential.

The Bad:

  • Puerto Rico Without Power (Again). Puerto Rico is without power (again? still?) after experiencing an island-wide blackout this week. Experts estimated power restoration could take anywhere from 24 to 36 hours, and the island didn’t have 100% capacity when this happened in the first place. At least one enterprising resident is taking this opportunity to set up solar power, and frankly that wouldn’t be a bad plan for the whole island from here.
  • Confirmation Biases. Jim Bridenstine, non-scientist NASA nominee extraordinaire, was confirmed along party lines this week. Since Bridenstine didn’t even enjoy full Republican support at first, this is not exactly good news. And speaking of flipping Republicans, we can thank Rand Paul for Pompeo’s progression to the full Senate floor, since he flipped only minutes before committee vote after refusing to endorse him as Secretary of State. That one is not yet finalized, though, because the full Senate has yet to vote. So here’s hoping.
  • Waffle House Shooting. Four people were killed in Nashville when an assailant with an AR-15 started shooting up a Waffle House. The shooter was apprehended today and is in police custody, although he is not cooperating with questioning. Needless to say, this is the latest in a deeply upsetting and ongoing trend of gun violence in public places, and the whole country mourns another senseless tragedy.

The Good:

So that’s what I have for now, and I’m going to enjoy the relative respite while it lasts before the dumpster fire starts back up again. I’ll catch you next week, and if you need anything before then, feel free to ping the National News Roundup ask box — send me questions! Send me feedback! Send me fire extinguishers!

National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 12 (April 8–14)


This administration, good gravy. I know the phrase “This week was a horrorshow” is losing all meaning, but on the plus side the administrative calls are not coming from inside your house. Yet. I checked.

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not a door man! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

This week included yet another couple stories regarding Casual Disregard of Governing Norms, because we live here now. Here’s what’s going on:

Against that backdrop, it’s not surprising that there was a lot of noteworthy Russia Investigation movement this week as well. Here’s a summary of the main things to know:

Your “Normal” Weird:

The Bad:

The Good:

Given how quickly the news cycle has started to move, I’m sure we’ll have seventeen new items by Friday — but that’s what I’ve got for now! I’ll catch y’all next week. And in the interim, if you need anything, there’s always the National News Roundup ask box — send me questions! Send me feedback! Send me pictures of your Grunkle Stan!

National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 11 (April 1–7)


If you don’t have time to watch read the full roundup this week, you could do worse than to watch this week’s SNL cold open, which summarizes at least 75% of what I’m about to type with startlingly accuracy. (And is probably funnier than me. But please read the news anyway, because you will definitely like some of the remaining 25%!)

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not a news station! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

This week included yet another couple stories regarding Casual Disregard of Governing Norms, cementing my suspicion that this subsection is a new staple in the roundup. It’s less than the last few weeks, on the plus side, and most of it this week involves Scott Pruitt. Here’s what’s going on now:

There was also significant movement on the Threats to the First Amendment front, which had been pleasantly absent in the roundup for a good while now. (Its resurgence is not a welcome change, I assure you.) Here’s the main story to know there:

On the plus side, there was a veritable renaissance of noteworthy Russia Investigation movement this week. (I’m sure we’ll be seeing the humanist Mueller paintings any time now.) Here’s a summary of the main things to know:

Your “Normal” Weird:

The Bad:

The Good:

  • Recent Suits of Armor. There have been a number of protective lawsuits either filed or expanded this week, which I’ve come to view as an important sign of organized resistance in the past year. First on the docket, there’s the five additional states and various cities that have joined the census lawsuit, bringing the total to about a third of the country and counting. But for more happy-making news, there’s also the fifteen Attorneys General suing the EPA for its failure to enforce pollution law, and the San Francisco suit being brought against Sessions for his decision to remove civil rights guidelines.
  • Teacher Strikes in Three States. Inspired by the example set in West Virginia, teachers in Arizona, Oklahoma and Kentucky have begun to strike as well. In all three states, teachers are asking for adequate teaching budgets and salaries in line with other states, hoping to correct systemic troubles in their states’ education systems that have lingered since the 2008 recession. It’s a brave and understandable move that I hope results in improved circumstances, especially in Arizona and Oklahoma, which are both among the bottom five states in the country for educational spending.
  • Opioid Options. The Surgeon General issued a statement this week supporting dissemination and trained use of Naloxone to address opioid emergencies. Naloxone, most commonly available as a nasal spray called Narcan, can be used as an antidote to overdose, making it extremely helpful in emergency and first-response situations. This is an exciting and noteworthy statement both because Surgeon General advisories are infrequent and because this is actually consistent with best evidence-based practices, which is not exactly a common occurrence in this administration. And that’s refreshing, to say the least!
  • Mueller Office Raid. The incredible news broke today that Mueller conducted a raid on the office, home, and hotel room of Trump’s attorney Michael Cohen, looking for documents relating to the Stormy Daniels case. Unsurprisingly, the raid was court authorized, meaning that Mueller had warrants (and therefore official permission) for the search. This type of approval is, needless to say, usually very hard to get, especially for searching an attorney’s office — traditionally an attorney’s work product is protected by attorney-client privilege. My personal theory on this (and only a theory, to be clear) is that Trump waived his privilege by denying knowledge of the hush money payment — if he had no knowledge, that means that Cohen wasn’t acting as his attorney when he made the payment, which means that none of it was attorney work product. Which means that this was brought on, in part, by Trump’s poor planning, and I find that delightful. Trump, to warn, has wasted no time in calling the raid “an attack on our country,” but activists are already organizing for the possibility that Trump will try to fire Mueller — and Mueller, of course, has plans upon plans for this contingency.

There’s still a bit of Roundup news to round out the week; since I didn’t get much done, expect to hear from me soon (no really this time) about finalizing any offered volunteer tasks and further refining the Roundup to meet reader needs. And in the interim, if you need anything, there’s always the National News Roundup ask box — send me questions! Send me feedback! Send me pictures of your lizard!

Ho boy, what a week. I guess we’ll see what next week brings.

National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 10 (March 25–31)


This week wasn’t quite as bad as last week, but that’s sort of like saying “Well this week, we only got six inches of snow” (which, incidentally, was also true). Still, progress is progress, I guess!

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not a million dollar loan! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

Just last week, this week had an impressive amount of Casual Disregard of Governing Norms. I’m starting to become concerned that this is going to be a new staple in the roundup, particularly because it seems to be accelerating as news of the Russia Investigation languishes. Here are the things to track this week:

One major difference from last week is that there was a lot of noteworthy Russia Investigation movement. Here’s a summary of the main things to know:

Your “Normal” Weird:

The Bad:

The Good:

  • Census Suit. As I mentioned briefly above, at least twelve states are already suing over the citizenship question on the 2020 census. The states’ argument is that the government has a constitutional requirement to track all residents in the United States and including the question will have a chilling effect that leads to under-counting. Since all of these things have the benefit of being true, I think it’s a fairly sound argument; I’m excited to see what happens in the suit.
  • DACA Big Deal. In related and also positive news, a Brooklyn court this week permitted the DACA suit brought by fifteen attorneys general to continue, declining to dismiss the case. In his decision, the judge cited Trump’s “racially charged language” as prima facie evidence of discrimination and therefore potential equal protection violation. It’s particularly edifying, given everything else going on, to read a judge write, “One might reasonably infer that a candidate who makes overtly bigoted statements on the campaign trail might be more likely to engage in similarly bigoted action in office.” Thank you for keeping us company in Reasonable Human land, Judge Garaufis!

There’s still a bit of Roundup news to round out the week; expect to hear from me soon (if you haven’t already) about finalizing any offered volunteer tasks and further refining the Roundup to meet reader needs. And in the interim, if you need anything, there’s always the National News Roundup ask box — send me questions! Send me feedback! Send me pictures of your dog!

And that’s all I have this week. Until next time, I have the honor to be your obedient servant, K.H.


National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 7 (March 4–10)

FOTO:FORTEPAN / Saly Noémi, via Wikimedia Commons

It’s getting harder and harder to even tell what’s weird anymore, y’all, because it’s all becoming a blur of inane and terrible oddity. One reader recently suggested I just create a Cartesian Plane of Weird and Bad, and chart out a little graph every week. Frankly, I’m starting to consider it.

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not a golf course! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

Mueller appears to be gaining the upper hand again in the Russia Investigation, though it’s perhaps a bit early to tell. Here’s the quick summary:

Meanwhile, as Mueller charges further ahead in his investigation, the Trump administration is mired in several Conflict of Interest and Emolument Clause scandals at once. Here’s what’s going on:

Your “Normal” Weird:

The Bad:

The Good:

And that’s all the news that’s fit to print, and frankly several pieces that aren’t. I’m still holding out hope that next week will be a better news week, because you never know, water might not be wet next week. But either way, I’ll be here, letting you know what’s up.


National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 5 (February 18–24)

Ernest Blaikley, via Wikimedia Commons

Folks, you seriously don’t even wanna know how many articles I have combed through on the topic of Parkland and/or gun control this week. I’m afraid most of it is a flaming trash heap — I particularly loathe the part where we apparently dox and threaten teen shooting survivors now — but I’ll try to give you the ten cent tour anyway. Bear with me and bare your teeth, because we have a long road ahead of us.

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not a Simpsons writer! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

So much positive change happened on the Russia Investigation in one week that I’m tempted to wonder whether Trump’s gun control antics are an attempt to distract us — although Occam’s razor suggests that he just really is that terrible. At any rate, here are the Russia-hued highlights:

  • The Nunes Memo: Somehow Still Topical. The House Democrats released a version of their counter to the Nunes memo this week, after substantial redaction at Trump’s direction. The report, at minimum, confirms that the Steele dossier wasn’t the basis for the Russia investigation; it does not, however, clear up the arguments over McCabe statements very much. All told, it’s minor support for the idea that Nunes is an jackass with a selective memory, but we basically knew that already.
  • Skadden Lawyer Pleads Guilty. On Tuesday, Mueller finalized a guilty plea and cooperation from Alex van der Zwaan, an attorney who spoke regularly with Manafort and Gates in fall 2016. Though this is far from the most interesting or important thing to happen in the past week, it probably did serve as a stepping stone to some of the later activity in the week, particularly when the Gates plea did not finalize as early as expected.
  • The Increasingly Elaborate Manafort-Gates Saga. The real meat and potatoes of this week’s Russia Investigation news is all of the news on Robert Manafort and Rick Gates, two sketchy dudes who worked on and headed the Trump campaign (respectively). Despite expectations, Gates had not yet plead guilty by the beginning of the week (though, as I noted above, van der Zwaan did). But then Mueller released new, additional indictments for both Gates and Manafort mid-week, significantly broadening the risk of exposure if they don’t cooperate. Having read the indictments, I can personally confirm the new indictments are wild, y’all — it’s a zany tour of how many different ways two people can commit tax and bank fraud to the tune of millions upon millions of dollars. The indictments also have a surprisingly complete account of wrong-doing for the incredible reason that Manafort made Gates convert all his Word documents to PDF, resulting in a paper trail for every fraudulent record created. Against that backdrop, it’s not surprising that Gates did ultimately plead guilty in exchange for cooperation and a reduced sentence by the end of the week. I hope his defection flips Manafort like a day-old pancake.

Your “Normal” Weird:

  • Ted Cruz vs the Simpsons. Ted Cruz won the undying animosity of Simpsons showrunner Al Jean this week by announcing that “the Democrats are the party of Lisa Simpson, and Republicans are happily the party of Homer and Bart and Maggie and Marge.” How Maggie has a political party as a canonical infant was not explored in the statement, though Al Jean had a lot to say about it. Meanwhile, liberals are proud to align with Lisa Simpson, who I’m not ashamed to admit was a role model for me when I was her age. (I was six when The Simpsons premiered, and now that I’ve pointed this out you get to feel as old as I do. You’re welcome.)
  • Thank Goodness Trump Created the Rating System. This week’s subtheme of Incredibly Weird Comments about Pop Culture continues with some statements Trump made proposing a rating system for movies and video games as a solution for mass shootings. Which, in Trumpland, we apparently don’t already have, and apparently didn’t first adopt in 1968. Seriously, the movie rating system is so old that it has been in place Trump’s entire adult life, and even the video game rating system has been in place for twenty-four years. And, of course, this doesn’t even consider the fact that there’s no documented evidence for the link between movie violence and real-life violence. So, in basic summary: Yeesh.
  • White House Shenanigans. There was a fair amount of ridiculous White House shenanigans this week, which basically makes it like any other week since January 2017 but here we are. First in the queue, Trump pressured Sessions to do his first sanctioned investigation relating to Russian election interference — but not on Russia; that would make way too much sense. Instead, Trump is badgering Sessions to investigate Obama. (Fun fact: The reason Obama couldn’t do more about Russian interference is well-documented, and it rhymes with ‘SchmcConnell.’) As though to punctuate the White House dysfunction, while all this is going on there has also been an epic standoff between chief of staff John Kelly and local son-in-law Jared Kushner about Kushner’s security clearance, which still hasn’t been finalized after a year of investigation. My bet is that this will keep happening in the background of everything else this administration does right up until Trump is impeached or Kelly is fired. Whee, nepotism!

The Bad:

The Good:

  • Recent Court Wins. The Supreme Court declined to subvert ordinary judicial process today, refusing to hear the DACA injunction case before the 9th Circuit did. This was the expected outcome, but it’s still very relieving to hear; the court would not have been signaling anything good if it had met the Trump Administration’s demands and heard arguments. And in other good legal news, the Second Circuit held that federal discrimination laws also prohibit discrimination based on sexual orientation, making them the second circuit in the United States to do so. As a bonus, this court ignored a Trump memorandum stating the direct opposite in order to reach its conclusion — and it’s not even one of the two circuits that are known for thwarting him. Between the two decisions, it’s a happy day in Legal Schadenfreude Land.
  • Kentucky Special Election Results. A deeply red district elected a Democrat to the Kentucky House in a special election by a landslide 49 points this week, though the House itself will still be GOP-controlled. This is exciting because it’s such a huge change from the area’s traditional voting patterns, potentially forecasting the extreme landscape change we might see later this year in midterm elections and beyond. (Admittedly nothing is set in stone, but I’m daring to dream here.)
  • Parkland Organizing Continues Too. The flip side to the horrorshow outlined above is that some good advocacy and organizing have happened in the past week, too. Many, many companies have cut ties with the NRA in the past week, particularly after the NRA started expressing nasty sentiments about Parkland teens. And the teens themselves have continued to advocate in town hall meetings, interviews, and sessions with legislators, and a town hall hosted by CNN resulted in some deeply satisfying (and completely deserved) Marco Rubio savagery. My favorite, incidentally, is the teen who observed that we should call AR-15s ‘Marco Rubios’ because they’re both “so easy to buy.” Yikes.

And that’s all the news that’s fit to print this week, though much of it barely merits that kind of dignity. If you made it all the way through, my ice cream and I salute you. Here’s hoping next week is less terrible.

National News Roundup: Year 2, Week 4 (February 11–17)


Last week, the news was so overwhelming and demoralizing that I kicked a few stories from Monday out to the following roundup, hoping that things would be calmer then. I of course should have realized that by doing this, I virtually guaranteed that this week would be even more Chaotic Terrible than the last one. Sorry for jinxing all of us, folks!

Standard standing reminders apply: I am no journalist, though I play one in your inbox or browser, so I’m only summarizing the news within my area of expertise. This week’s news contains some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise — I’m a lawyer, not EPA security detail! — but all offroad adventures are marked with an asterisk. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!

Constitutional Crisis Corners:

This week started out a quiet time for the Russia Investigation, but it definitely ended with a bang! Here’s what I have for you:

Your “Normal” Weird:

  • What Rules of Professional Ethics? The White House attorney stable (and top DoJ staff, who clearly think they have a stall in that barn) have managed to lower my professional opinion of them further this week — which is kind of a neat trick, because I didn’t even know that was possible by this point. First prize in appalling practice goes to long-time Trump attorney Michael Cohen, who announced this week that he personally paid Stormy Daniels $130,000 to shut her up in 2016. For those attorneys reading this and thinking “Wait, did he just admit to a blatant violation of the Rules of Professional Ethics while violating client confidentiality and breaching a nondisclosure contract at the same time?” — why yes, yes he did. Stormy Daniels, bless her, has already announced that she is now free to talk about the whole thing, because Cohen breached the NDA agreement.
  • DOJ Deserting and Dog Whistles. Though my best antipathy goes to Cohen this week, there’s still plenty left over for the Department of Justice. Rachel Brand, third in command after Rod Rosenstein and Jeff Sessions, announced that she’s stepping down after just nine months at her current post. Though she’s ostensibly leaving because the legal department at Walmart was just so attractive, several sources note that she was very frustrated by all the vacancies in her department and afraid she might have to supervise Mueller (with all that would entail) if Rosenstein was fired. Against that backdrop, it kind of underscored the point to watch Jeff Sessions discussthe Anglo-American heritage of law enforcement” this week. Though the department defended his statements as a simple reference to common law, you cannot convince me that was anything other than an intentional dog whistle — a normal human being would have simply said “common law,” which is a much more common phrase, and the use of the word ‘heritage’ is kind of a glaring neon sign. To be fair to Rachel Brand, I wouldn’t want to work for Donald “I Fire You Cause It’s Tuesday” Trump and the Racist Brigade anymore, either.
  • Weird White House Odds and Ends. Disturbingly, the previous two headers are not the end of the wacky news coming out of the White House this week, because we haven’t even gotten to the non-lawyer shenanigans yet. Despite all probability, somehow the White House is still tossing out Porter-related prevarications, with the never-ending string of lies making it look more and more likely that the White House knew about his domestic violence the entire time and he was affirmatively not cleared for his position because of the blackmail potential his abuse history created. And, as if to punctuate that point, Reince Priebus soundbites have started coming out about his time as White House Chief of Staff as a book about the position gets ready to launch. News outlets are already having a field day with one choice quote, “Take everything you’ve heard and multiply it by 50” — probably because this administration is such a goat rodeo that we don’t need more words than that before we believe it. But Vanity Fair gladly gives us a panoply of choice excerpts from the book anyway, and they’re all pretty much exactly as horrorshow as you might expect.

The Bad:

The Good:

  • Recent Court Case Wins. A second district court enjoined the Department of Homeland Security from enforcing the DACA repeal on March 5 this past week, putting more pressure on the administration to avoid deporting people who participated in the DACA program. (You’d think the first case would be its own deterrent, but let’s face it, this bunch isn’t noted for listening to courts.) And just today, the Pennsylvania Supreme Court issued a new districting map, making good on its threat to turn this judicial car around if Democrats and Republicans couldn’t draw new voting districts on their own. So now that task is definitely done before November elections, which is a really important development in a swing state that just barely broke for Trump in 2016.
  • Parkland Kids Owning Politicians Left and Right.* The kids most directly impacted by Wednesday’s shooting are acting more mature and decisively than the rest of us put together, organizing marches and calling out politicians as well as the NRA. Their candor is as exemplary as it is horrifying; I hope the rest of us step up to the plate soon, because traumatized high schoolers should not be forced to be the adults here.

And that’s all the news I have for you this week, in its technicolor and vaguely nauseating glory. Hopefully next week will be better, and you’ll hear from me either way. In the meantime, I’m off to spend some quality time with my freezer’s ice cream selection.