For most of the past few weeks, the big story in the news was the release of the Epstein files–or, more accurately, Trump’s obvious involvement therein and the executive reindeer games that kept many files hidden (even after the Congressionally-imposed deadline had passed). By the time that I’m typing this, however, the malignant Cheeto has raided Venezuela and kidnapped its (ostensible) President, and now nobody is really talking about the Epstein files. It’s funny how that works, isn’t it?
Several nouveau and some classic reminders still apply: we may be well into my ninth year of journalism, but I focus on national news within my areas of expertise–which, at this point, includes (1) health news, (2) queer news, (3) news about law and government, (4) news about descent into authoritarianism, and (5) connections between news stories. NNR summaries may still occasionally contain some detailed analysis that’s outside my expertise–I’m a lawyer, not an Epstein file!–but we are moving away from this model in general, as we pioneer a more focused and sustainable format. And, of course, for the law things you read here, I’m offering context that shouldn’t be considered legal advice. Okay, I think that’s about it for the disclaimers. Onward to the news!
Spills in Aisle 47
‘Toddler Supermarket Tantrum,’ taken with permission from Stockcake.com
- Just Reminding You That 47 Is A Criminal. With everything else going on, you would be forgiven for missing anything that wasn’t Epstein or Venezuela. But I’m here to tell you that you should feel particularly blameless about missing that a transcript of prosecutor Jack Smith’s House-mandated testimony was released–on December 31, 2025. (For those of you playing the home game, Jack Smith was the special counsel who indicted Trump for insurrection and illegal possession of documents, and he’s currently under investigation for… doing that.) Unsurprisingly, much of Smith’s testimony boiled down to “yes, I was really really sure that Trump was guilty of things when I did my job and prosecuted him,” and here we all are. And on the subject of spray-tanned criminality, as I noted above, 47 was also in the news for much of the cycle because he pops up in the Epstein files over and over.
- Manifest Fuckery. As mentioned above, the big bombshell of the last few days is that our government just done abducted Nicolás Maduro, the extremely sketchy dude who has been running Venezuela for a third term since a questionable election in 2024. There’s little question that the abduction was illegal, and extreme even against the U.S.’s less-than-stellar history in places like Iraq and Panama. Trump also took the unusual step of straight-up saying all the quiet parts out loud, between claiming that the U.S. would ‘run’ Venezuela and noting that the whole thing was about seizing oil–which we had the grace to at least pretend wasn’t true during the Iraq Wars. Now that Maduro is in New York awaiting federal arraignment for narco-terrorism, Trump is also talking about attacking Colombia and stealing Greenland from Denmark (again).
- Goodbye, National Guard. One highlight of the current news cycle is that the Supreme Court told Trump, in essence, to get the National Guard out of Dodge. (And by Dodge, I mean Illinois.) Trump has withdrawn troops from Chicago, Los Angeles, and Portland, and is trying to play it off like he just decided to leave one day, which is hilarious to watch. He’s of course threatening to come back again at some undisclosed later date, and that’s certainly possible, but for now, it’s a win.
From the Department of Health and Human Sacrifice
Image unnamed and in the public domain
Not Evidence Based (Again, Still). We remain in vaccine hell as I type this, and boy howdy am I tired of telling you that. The new exciting ramification of vaccine rates falling below herd immunity levels is more whooping cough in small children. Naturally, this administration didn’t let that stop them from slashing vaccine recommendations for said children just today, from 17 mandated vaccinations down to 11. The vaccines no longer required are those that cover flu, hepatitis A, rotavirus and meningococcal disease. For funsies, they’re deciding this as flu-like illness reaches an all-time high, thanks to a new variant called Subclade K. (In case you are someone who needs to hear this, by the way, yes, the flu shot is still worth something against new variants like this.)
Ways to Weather This
Image unnamed and licensed to the public under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License
Stay Human, Shape Tomorrow. This isn’t the first time I’ve pointed folks towards Paul Shattuck‘s excellent writings on what he calls Strategic Humanism, and I’m sure it won’t be the last. This particular cycle, I want to draw attention to a recent post about what he calls “circuit-breakers” for doom scrolling–a useful skill for basically all of us when something bombastic like this past news cycle happens. HIs post has a good amount of more specific information, but in essence, he talks about a combination of ways to take breaks with intentionality and ways to ground yourself in your current place and time. If you’re in a hurry, here are some concrete suggestions he gives:
- Look away from your screen and name five objects in the room.
- Turn off your phone and put it in a drawer for one hour.
- Set a 3-minute timer and step away.
- Pick one corner of your physical space and restore it for two minutes.
- Text someone.
So that’s what I have for you this cycle, and the wait did not improve anything. For making it through, you deserve Minion’s opinions and a less corrupt government. I’m still figuring out sustainability, and I would love feedback in the National News Roundup ask box, which is there for your constructive comments. And, of course, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that my org’s handy-dandy survey measuring health throughout 2025 will be live until 1/31, and it only takes a half hour of your time to make the science go. Send me questions! Send me feedback! Send me responses to Out: The Community Survey!
National News Roundup 